The Herald-Zeitung

Have you ever tricked yourself into doing something just for your own benefit? Or perhaps made a deal with yourself that not only enhances the quality of your life, but renews the spirit of your being?

So many times all we need to do to make a difference in our lives is to make a personal pledge with ourselves and no one else.

Shortly after I graduated from college I experienced a very painful period in my life due to a failed relationship with someone for whom I deeply cared. Full of despair I sensed my whole personality changing for the worse. I was negative and depressed and angry at the world. Then one morning I went to the bathroom and found my can of shaving cream empty.

Upon returning from a quick trip to the store with a new batch of foam I decided that I would give myself the time “in one can of shaving cream” to get over my despondency. Each morning I found myself using more than I needed to empty the can as quickly as possible because I wanted to honor the pledge I had made with myself.

Finally when the final few ounces of foam flowed out of the container and I dropped the can into the trash, I also symbolically deposited my feelings of sadness and disappointment.

The secret deal I had made with myself and that can of cream did the trick. Similarly, an old friend of mine who had smoked for over 25 years had tried numerous ways to quit finally found the strength to give up his habit. When I asked him how he finally managed to do it, he said that one day he realized it was his late mother’s birthday. He remembered that she had always hated the fact that he smoked and so he made a bargain with himself that he would honor his mother’s memory from that day forward by never touching another cigarette. And he never did.

In his book, “Word Power – Life Power” Vernon Howard tells the story of a man who had to climb 15 steps leading up to his garden. One day he decided that he would use those steps as a symbol for his own self-development. Thus he gave each step the name of a quality he wanted to nurture within himself – patience, optimism, determination, etc. Each day as he climbed those steps he would imagine himself mentally growing in those qualities. Howard notes his progress ascending that staircase was a journey towards a richer, more fruitful life.

Often the best way for us to improve our lives comes from the strength of our very own determination that we find in the least likely of places. It may be as simple as a short flight of stairs or an ordinary container of shave lotion.

It’s just a matter of looking around and taking that “journey within ourselves”-a journey that may benefit us most of all.